Remember the movie "Snake on a Plane"? Well, I have something even better:
|Look, it's a pine tree!|
But look closer. See something yet?
|I see a tail|
|A raccoon's tail!|
This raccoon, I shall call him Rocco from now on, is an attention seeker. He climbed the pine tree, aka my scratch pad, and rested his butt down on that branch. Half of the neighborhood plus the mailman came to watch him. My other mama was scared because Rocco was right in front of her place. She definitely didn't want him to drop down on her.
The humans plotted a way to take Rocco down in vain. This raccoon climbed very high up on the pine tree. In the skin searing heat of the South, the humans plotted and plotted, waited and waited. Then, either Rocco became tired or the branch was not that comfortable, he left.
While the mamarazzi says "When pigs fly", I say "When raccoons climb on a tree", as in "When raccoons climb on a tree that I will eat this disgusting cat food." Now, thanks to Rocco, I have to eat whatever cat food the mamarazzi gave me. And it ain't that bad. She upgraded me to Meow Mix seafood medley.
Friday Movie Preview: The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Pray tell, Disney, who did Nicholas Cage's weave? Did you guys hire the same person who did Britney's hair? It's real bad, dude, real bad. Not only I disprove, Rocco the raccoon also say nay. And you should know Rocco and I don't see eye to eye on a lot of things, the first being he eats my food.
Come on, Disney, this is the guy who made "National Treasures" into an international franchise. I think he deserves better weave, don't you? I'm sure this movie is going to be swell but the weave...yuck! Disney, you should consult Tyra on all weave-related subjects from now on.
|I'm outta here, it's been a rough day!|
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